The Challenge of Aloneness and Loneliness For Independent Consultants

If you work as an independent consultant often youon the amount time when you want to enjoy being
will find yourself working alone even though you mayin the company of others or when you just want to
have close friends or family members. In fact,enjoy your own company.
depending on the type of consulting work that youChoose aloneness and discard loneliness if you work
do, finding time to be alone may be a must. Howeveras an independent consultant. It is not difficult to find
aloneness should not be confused with loneliness. Fororganizations and groups to join if you are single or
two terms which sounds so similar, there is a worldto plan family activities for fun and enjoyment.
of difference between the two. The difference is asIndeed, finding time for fun and enjoyment is a basic
stark as a comparison between running and sleeping.human need that we should fulfill. However, it is
Loneliness is a state of dependency. When you sayimportant that you control that time and not let it
that you are lonely, you essentially saying that youinterfere with your need for survival and growth and
have a need for others to entertain you; to comforta professional. At least, use the time alone to read at
you; to support you; or to meet some type ofleast an hour a day materials that helps you to build
emotional need. On the other hand, alonenesson your strengths or to acquire new knowledge or a
suggests the opposite. It suggests a condition ofskill.
self-reliance whereas you have made a consciousAnd, if that feeling of loneliness starts to creep in,
decision to be alone because your work as antake yourself away from familiar surroundings. Go to
independent consultant requires it or you need to bea new restaurant. Go to a local fair, festival or
alone to accomplish some personal objectives.concert. Plan that vacation that you have been
However, experiencing either aloneness or lonelinessthinking about. Or, call an acquaintance that you
is a matter of choice. To be clear, aloneness is thehaven't talked to in a long time. As an independent
mark of emotional maturity, whereas loneliness is theconsultant, you have to train yourself outside of your
unmistakable hallmark of the immature.chosen work to invent activity of your own, to build,
Aloneness is the source of our greatest strength,to make, to discover, to explore, and to improvise in
but, loneliness is the sign of our greatest weakness.the world around you. You do not need someone to
We you choose aloneness, you are saying that bytake you by the hand and lead you.
choosing to be alone you want to personally decide