| Aspire to Be Considerate forms the foundation for all | | | | relationships. The be we use in public and behind |
| mannerly acts. Manners are more than just the rules | | | | closed doors directly affects everyone we come in |
| of proper behavior: knowing the difference between | | | | contact with. With practice, aspiring to be considerate |
| American and Continental styles of dining, making eye | | | | will be-come our be-havior. |
| contact, not talking with food in your mouth, and | | | | Consideration means being mindful of others and |
| respecting elders, for example. Manners are the | | | | showing thoughtful concern for or sensitivity toward |
| essence of how we relate to others, showing value | | | | the feelings of others. Being considerate, consistently |
| to our fellow man by extending respect to those we | | | | considerate, requires looking beyond ourselves and |
| live and work with, as well as those we pass on the | | | | our needs to consider the needs of others--not just |
| street. | | | | the people we know or encounter in our daily routine |
| Aspire denotes the act of seeking, desiring, and | | | | but everyone, no matter how irritating or different |
| wanting. I selected the word aspire over always | | | | they may be. (Sometimes being considerate means |
| because aspiring reminds us that learning to be | | | | using self-control to hold our tongues!) Consideration |
| considerate is a process. If we tell ourselves or our | | | | requires slowing down and putting people before |
| children we must always be courteous, we are | | | | tasks. It means arriving on time to an event even if |
| setting everyone up for disappointment . . . and | | | | we have to leave a task unfinished, taking the extra |
| failure. Even as an Etiquette Consultant, some days I | | | | steps required to return the shopping cart, making |
| feel that I should lose the business cards and stay | | | | eye contact with the gas station attendant, or |
| home: the girls have a meltdown in the grocery | | | | surprising a friend with dinner if he or she is in a |
| store, a thank-you note is sent weeks late, or I say | | | | difficult situation. The key to consideration is staying |
| my name so fast that the person responds, "Nice to | | | | connected to the needs of others. Just as a lamp |
| meet you, Cindy." Aspiring to be considerate rather | | | | does not work unless the cord is plugged into an |
| than expecting to always be considerate gives us | | | | outlet, the same is true with our relationships. Unless |
| hope. Through aspiration our journey begins and the | | | | we are plugged in to the needs of those around us, |
| pleasure of personal contact with others begins to | | | | we all remain in the dark, bumbling around and running |
| blossom. Our family will see our newfound courtesy; | | | | into each other. |
| our coworkers will admire it; and when our head hits | | | | In the bustle of our busy lives, it is easy to grow |
| the pillow at night, we can rest assured that we | | | | careless in our relationships. For most of us, showing |
| have done our best. | | | | consideration is not a basic instinct but a learned skill |
| Be--what does this little verb mean? To exist, live, be | | | | that must be constantly sharpened through practice, |
| alive, be real. A powerful, yet simple, two-letter word | | | | practice, practice . . . Remember: Aspire to Be |
| that defines the quality of our interpersonal | | | | Considerate and you'll be well on your way. |